The Bodyguard

Study Guide by Liz

Get a colonoscopy. Listen to Miley Cyrus and Britney Spears discuss world politics.

Be a contestant on Survivor.

*rings buzzer* What are "Things Liz would rather do than study?"


I've never been the "studious" type.  In fact, and I've never really been a "details" type of girl and well, quite frankly, cramming really cramps my style.

So you may find it funny that I pursued a career in an industry where constant learning in essential and testing your knowledge is a common occurence.  But somehow, I always found a way to make it work...Until I had kids.

I had always thought it was a myth that you can't remember shit after having children. Um, yeah. I couldn't have been more wrong.  Since giving birth to mine, I can barely remember where my keys are each day, let alone memorize the statistical analysis of seven clinical trials.  In fact, I spent twenty minutes frantically searching for my bluetooth last week, only to find it...on my ear. And the only thing I seem to be able to remember these day is who won last week's elimination challenge on Top Chef and the plotline for Grey's Anatomy.

Not to mention the fact that all this haphazard studying makes me feel like I've boarded a time machine and traveled to...1994. Like I'm pulling an all-nighter in the Cal Poly library so I can flirt with that cute boy from Communication 101 (Because really, is there any other reason to pull an all-nighter?) and attempting in vain to figure out how the f*ck to work the Lexis Nexis. Yeah, you heard me right, Lexis Nexis.  I've just officially  admitted that I attended college before internet was available.  Back then, we were so looking forward to seeing what that "Information Superhighway" was all about.  And the only way to research a paper was to actually open a book. *insert dinosaur jokes here*

Back then, my biggest worry was what I would wear to that night's sorority mixer or what drink wouldn't make me throw up on the way home in Marty Mazda .  So, because  I just can't  get Whatta Man by Salt N Pepa out of my head, I've decided to take a break from memorizing P values and take a leisurely stroll down memory lane...Care to join me?

Lisa & Liz, early 90s fashion victim edition


1. Brown-braided belt with polo shirt with penny loafers

Why Lisa and I felt the need to deny any and all sex appeal in order to channel our inner-male with this ensemble will always baffle me.  And I think we actually put a penny in our loafers.  Gag!  To this day, I still can't shake my aversion for collared shirts.  NEVUH AGAIN, I SAY!

2. The soundtrack to The Bodyguard

I don't want to call anyone out(Lisa) but someone(Lisa) REALLY liked this soundtrack.  And that someone would sing it very loudly, as if they were channeling Whitney Houston herself.  ALOT.  Okay, okay, maybe I sang with her.  Sometimes.

3.  Gas for $1.09 and homes for $119,000

Do you think they'll let me fill up my time machine before I head home?  Or just stay and make an offer on that place I've had my eye on?  Because I'd be willing to tolerate scrunchies and the rise of the Spice Girls again if it meant I could have affordable housing!

4. Bobby McGee's

If you needed to find me on any given Thursday, Friday or Saturday, I'd be here in my shortest skort doing the poor-man's electric slide or shaking my ass to the Macarena.  And I used to wonder why I was single?

5.  The "Rachel" haircut

Oh, how I wanted this haircut.  In fact, "The Rachel" is the whole reason I got off my ass and learned how to straighten my hair.  Because although the 80's were kind to those of us who were follically challenged, the nineties had no such patience. Unfortunately, I never did quite perfect my "Rachel", prompting others to refer to it as the "Rochelle", her slightly frizzy second cousin.

What was your Must List in the nineties?

xoxo, Liz

Shoulders pads and skorts by Liz

A couple of weeks ago  I was flipping through the millions of channels on my TV and almost squealed out loud when I saw that the movie Clueless was on! It's one  of my all-time favorites and as watched it, I found myself once again caught up in Cher's world.  I was laughing my ass off as she and Dionne attemped to make over Tai and had tears in my eyes when she finally came to her senses and hooked up with Josh.  And btw,  I've been in love with Paul Rudd ever since the first time I saw him in this movie.  I was happy to see he hasn't aged a day!

But what really struck me as I watched Clueless was how the movie made me feel.  I was instantly transported to 1994 and was almost expecting my college roommates  to roll in any minute wearing polo shirts and penny loafers  to sit down and watch with me!  I also winced at the memory of people always saying I looked like Tai, but I always told myself that they were referring to the post makeover version.

That night, I started thinking about all the other movies that pinpoint a certain period in my life. Movies that instantly conjure up a vivid memory(good or bad or even really horrible) and transport you there, almost like a time machine!

So after careful consideration, here are my top "time machine" movies:

1. Sixteen Candles/Pretty in Pink/Some Kind of Wonderful/Breakfast Club (1984-1987)

I'm lumping all the John Hughes films together because they all represent the same era.  I clearly remember being dropped off by my Mom at the movies in eighth grade to watch Pretty in Pink with all the cool girls and hoped that they wouldn't notice how badly I wanted to fit in.

And I totally developed my "Prince Charming" complex from Jake.  I spent most of the 90's waiting for my night in shining armor to pull up in his 911 Porche and sweep me off my feet.

And when "If You Were Here" by the Thompson Twins (btw,whatever happened to them?) plays at the end as Samantha blows out her candles, I think we all heaved a sigh of relief that the geeky girl got the guy.  It gave us all hope that we could have a Jake of our own someday.

2. Heathers(1988)

Those were the days of shoulder pads and skorts!  And looking back, who the hell thought it would be a good idea  for women look like linebackers?  I can only speak for myself, but adding any kind of volume to my clothes at that time was a very bad idea!

I'm embarrassed to admit that Lisa and I used to quote this movie incessantly in high school, our favorite one being "What's your damage, Heather?"  We even went as far as to decide which Heather we were.  I was pleased to be crowned the yellow Heather and our friend LaSundra never walked taller than the day we bestowed the Red Heather label to her.

This movie always reminds me of the special friendships I had in high school.  And I'm proud to say that those same girls are still a part of my life!  But unlike the characters in Heathers, we were able to make it through senior year without trying to murder each other and blow up the school.  But just barely!

3. Two Moon Junction(1988)

Okay, so let's first all admit that we've seen this naughty movie about a hot girl who runs off and has an affair with some drifter guy. Lisa would rent the tape and sneak it in so we could try to figure what the big deal was about that sex thing everyone was always talking about.   Because we certainly weren't watching this movie for the plot!  In fact, I couldn't remember a damn thing  until I googled it for this blog.  And I've never been able to look  at Sherilyn Finn without thinking about what a bad girl she was in this movie!

It reminds me of being a curious and insecure girl just trying to figure it all out.  And now that I have a daughter of my own, it horrifies me think that one day she might use a movie like Two Moon Junction as Sex Ed 101!

4. Wayne's World(1992)

Wayne's World came out my freshman year of college and it always reminds me of how exciting it was to be away from home for the first time.  In fact, I remember grabbing a six pack of  Zimas (of course I had a fake ID! Thank you Valerie Saylor!) and sneaking them into the theater to watch this movie for the third time and see if it would be funnier if we were drunk.  In case you were wondering, it was!

5. The Bodyguard (1992)

Wow, did Lisa and I love this movie!  We were living together in college and we must have watched it fifty times and regularly rocked out to the soundtrack in our living room, using anything we could find as microphones for our concert.

I loved Whitney(Damn you Bobby Brown for ruining her!) and Kevin Costner's brooding bodyguard character was so yummy!  This movie always reminds me of that silly side of myself that I never want to lose.

6. The Fugitive (1993)

The Fugitive was the first movie I went to see by myself. Earlier in the day, I had gotten in a huge fight with my roommates (I can't remember what about, maybe I accused them of stealing my scrunchie?) and stormed out.  After making a dramatic phone call to them from a pay phone, I hid out at the movies for a couple of hours before heading back, my tail between my legs.

7. She's All That (1999)

This movie came out the week after my long-term boyfriend and I  broke up and I can never hear the song "Kiss Me" or see this movie without thinking about it. I can still vividly remember feeling heartbroken, terrified and hopeful all at the same time.

8. Pulp Fiction (1994)

I don't like this movie.  At all.  But my husband loves it and he screened it for me on our third date.  And even though I hated every minute of it, I acted liked I loved it every single time we watched it. And I even laughed every time he quoted that stupid Quarter Pounder with Cheese line from the movie.  Pulp Fiction lovers know which one I'm talking about.  Don't make me repeat it!

The thing is, I didn't pretend to like it because I wanted him to like me, I pretended to like it because that's when I realized that I loved him.  I've since admitted that I hate Pulp Fiction(much to his disappointment) but it always reminds me of that exciting feeling when you realize you've found someone you can love for the rest of your life!

So there you have it people!  These are the movies that have defined my life thus far.  What are yours?