Acupuncture, yoga even Feng Shui. No, I'm not talking about the hobbies of some spiritual yogi , I'm talking about me. I'm not sure exactly how it happened, but I've recently turned into a sage burning, crystal buying, lavender spraying, wheat free eating, universe asking optimist!
I've even *gasp* meditated!
Me. Lisa Steinke, er, Dannenfeldt. She who used to be, well, a lot more intense and would have never thought she could lie still for five seconds, let alone five minutes. But there is one problem I have as I lie on my blue mat, arms outstretched, breathing in and out. I can't seem to keep my mind from wandering. And no matter how hard I try, one thought keeps creeping in. No, not Josh Duhamel without a shirt on. Or my baffling girl crush on Kara DioGuardi.
I keep thinking about...
And even with my new "zen-itude", it's hard to remain peaceful and calm and focused on your freakin' breath when you're slowly but surely STARVING TO DEATH on your new gluten and wheat-free diet.
And I can be one angry bee-yotch when I'm hungry. And there ain't a crystal or a lavender tea on this planet that can save anyone in my path when I haven't eaten. (Sorry, honey!)
Because, P.S., EVERYTHING has wheat in it. Everything.
Which you don't realize until You. Cannot. Have. It.
Want a hamburger? Sor-ry. The bun isn't in compliance.
Craving a sandwich? Oh well. That would require bread.
Want pasta? Too bad. Unless you want RICE spaghetti. YUM-ME!
And don't even get me started on going out to eat. Um, waiter, I'd like the tuna fish sandwich, hold the bread and mayonnaise please. (Yup, it's in mayo too). Woo, hoo!
So why am I putting myself through this wheat-free hell if it's so, well, hellish? Because I do feel better. And I am starting to find things that I can consume other than fruits and vegetables (if I even look at another banana I might hurt someone). I've discovered wheat-free a.k.a. "rice" tortillas that I make with rice cheese (um, yeah, I don't do dairy either) and black beans (no wheat in those!). Ooh, how exciting! A tortilla-free, cheese free quesadilla!
But did I mention my skin looks great?