Falling off the wagon, Loehmann's style by Liz

Hi, my name is Liz and I'm a shopping addict. Well, more like a recovering shopping addict.  At least I was in recovery until an ill-fated trip to Loehmann's last week.

But let me back up a little.  For those of you that are regulars around here, you heard me bragging about my Cash & Carry financial plan a few months ago.  And it wasn't bullsh*t-I had broken up with my Amex gold card last year and hadn't looked back since. Lately, I'm the one who has the cash when it's time to split the bill.  And I no longer feel like puking when I log into American Express's website to check out my balance.  However, I may have failed to mention the secret to my success. Something that I feared would be hard to keep up long term.  A theory that I decided to test last week.

Long story short, I failed miserably.

It all started when those pesky little children of mine began to grow out of their clothes.  I tried to ignore my daughter's tummy hanging out of her now too-short shirts and my son's flood pants.  Because I knew that stepping one foot into that overpriced, pushy salesperson jungle of a store called Justice would undo all my hard work these past months.  My dirty little secret? The only way I had been able to stop spending was to not step foot ANYWHERE that I love to shop for the past six months.

Target? It pained me, but I sent the hubs to stroll those glorious aisles.

Gap? Supervised online shopping only.

Loehmann's? I told myself those communal dressing rooms were terrible for my self-esteem.

And my strategy had been working damn well.  But now a growth spurt threatened to ruin it all.  Damn you children's multi-vitamins!

But being the Type-A beyotch I am, I was determined to come up with a solution.  And 100,000 American Express points later, I had one. (One perk to my addiction:membership rewards!)

So armed with gift cards from every store the kids like, I was able to purchase clothes that fit without going over my husband-allotted cash allowance.  But even being in the store was intoxicating.  I started to remember what a high shopping always gave me.  That feeling that my daughter just HAD to have those scratch and sniff jammies(WTF with those anyway?).  I tried to ignore my shopping buzz and just get what they needed. But there was no mistake-the shopping beast had been awakened in me once more.

Fast forward to the next week that included my two BFs bdays as well as an hour to kill within spitting distance of the Beverly Hills Loehmanns. I told myself that I was only going in there for them.  That they loved Loehmann's and I'd be a horrible friend if I didn't buy them something from there.  But from the moment that I walked in, I was drunk with happiness at their selection of Calvin Klein dresses.  High with the anticipation of wearing that straw fedora at the pool FOUR months from now when we went on vacay.  Cracked out at the thought of shaking my ass in that Michael Kors skirt.  And even though it made me feel slightly ill, I pulled out that gorgeous gold card and slapped it down for the cashier like the last six months had never happened.

I had officially fallen off the wagon.

Oh, but on a positive note, I did find Lisa something really cute for her bday!

That night, as I unsuccessfully tried to hide the bag from the hubs behind my ass (I haven't worked out much lately, thought it might work?!), I felt even worse.  Sick with guilt and regretting my actions, wanting to eat carbs and greasy food-it was clear that I had the shopping hangover from hell.

So guess what?  I'm taking all that sh*t back this week.  And just like any addict, I'll start over again from day one. And even though I know it's the right thing to do, I still think I would've ROCKED that straw fedora by the pool. *sigh*

What are your addictions?  Leave a comment and let me know!  Or just make me feel better about mine.

xo, Liz

 

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Barbara O'Neal's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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DELICIOUS BOOK ALERT! Yep, that's right-we've found another great book about food.  We don't know if it's just a trend or we just love reading about carbs since we deprive ourselves of them, but either way we have another novel that we think you'll devour! That's why we were crazy excited when Barbara O'Neal agreed to share her 5 Do's and a Do-Over with us.  Her latest, How to Bake a Perfect Life: A Novel, is a sweet story that we highly recommend you indulge in!  We spent a rainy Sunday curled up reading it and think that you'll love it too! And the icing on the cake?  Her 5 Do's and a Do-Over were just as delectable as her novel.

Professional baker Ramona Gallagher is a master of an art that has sustained her through the most turbulent times, including a baby at fifteen and an endless family feud. But now Ramona’s bakery threatens to crumble around her. Literally. She’s one water-heater disaster away from losing her grandmother’s rambling Victorian and everything she’s worked so hard to build.

When Ramona’s soldier son-in-law is wounded in Afghanistan, her daughter, Sophia, races overseas to be at his side, leaving Ramona as the only suitable guardian for Sophia’s thirteen-year-old stepdaughter, Katie. Heartbroken, Katie feels that she’s being dumped again—this time on the doorstep of a woman out of practice with mothering.

Ramona relies upon a special set of tools—patience, persistence, and the reliability of a good recipe—when rebellious Katie arrives. And as she relives her own history of difficult choices, Ramona shares her love of baking with the troubled girl. Slowly, Katie begins to find self-acceptance and a place to call home. And when a man from her past returns to offer a second chance at love, Ramona discovers that even the best recipe tastes better when you add time, care, and a few secret ingredients of your own.

Are you dying to read it now? Well, good thing we have ___ copies to give away!  Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win.  We'll choose the winners on Sunday, March 27th after 6pm EST.  Good Luck.  And quick reminder:  All of our giveaways are for US/Canada residents only.  So sorry to our lovely readers outside of those countries-we still got mad love for ya!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: BARBARA O'NEAL'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

1. Take a chance on something that seems impossible.  Write a novel, maybe, or throw your heart into a crumbling old house and try to save it from the wrecking ball.  When my boys were small and we were poor, I fell in love with an old house down the street. It was empty, maybe abandoned, and I could see into the light falling across the stairway, and upstairs was a big room with a bay window beneath the high pointed eaves.  Every morning, I walked by and it whispered to me.  Somehow, with no money whatsoever, we ended up buying it and spending years and years renovating one thing and then another.  There was a ghost in the garden, who befriended my cats, and it was her ancient globe lilies and giant roses that grew out of the rock hard dirt in the backyard.  (I am convinced she is the one who called me to save her house.) My children grew up with torn up floors and ancient bathrooms and sheetrock tape, the two of them crammed together in one bedroom so I could have the tiny office downstairs for work.  It was a house of great love, and although it never became This Old House, all gleaming and perfectly restored, we saved it from the wrecking ball.

2. Make friends and tend your female relationships. I was lucky enough to grow up in a female-centric world, where my grandmother reined as matriarch, with my mother, my aunts, and my sisters all swirling around a world that had a few men, like pepper for seasoing, but not many.  And while I love the company of men (and myself had two sons I adore), the relationships that sustain us over time are the ones we forge with other women.  A good friend makes you laugh, keeps you honest, listens on the other end of the phone for three hours when you have a broken heart.  The thing I hear from some readers, however, is “how do I make friends when I’m not in school/work for myself/have retired?”   Lots of ways—join a book club, find an agreeable spiritual center, take up a new kind of exercise.  Then reach out and be friendly to others.  This is a very simple part of the plan, and very scary for some people.  What if they are rejected? You might well be.  But sometimes, you won’t be, and then you might meet someone who will be a friend.

3. Volunteer somewhere. Anywhere. It helps the world for you to put your hands into solving problems, but it also helps you to be a more grateful and thoughtful person.  It’s amazing to me how much angst and fury an afternoon at the soup kitchen can ease.  Go where you feel you might make a difference.  A woman I know is a court-appointed advocate for children in the court system.  Another likes the women’s shelter and I have a bunch of friends who volunteer for dog and cat rescue groups and the Humane Society.  I like serving food at the local spiritual community, predictably.  You are busy, I get that, but do it anyway.

4. Take the time to make things beautiful when you can. One of my friends is so good at this—everything she does is beautiful. She’ll take the time to scatter some rose petals over a buffet, or serve hard boiled eggs in egg cups.   I’m never quite as talented as I’d like on this, but I notice how much pleasure it gives me when I do. So try it.  Serve your canned chicken noodle soup in a pretty bowl you picked up at Goodwill, with a cloth napkin.  Grow a pot of petunias or a geranium in a pot on your front step, or buy flowers at the grocery store and put them on a vase in your kitchen or beside your bed, or even on the back of the toilet.  Take the time to add a pretty bracelet to your workaday outfit. Fold a note on pretty paper and stick it in a child’s lunch box.  Cut the sandwich in half and add a slice of orange to the plate. The world might be crazy, but you can make some sanity right in this very minute with small gestures of beauty.

5. Make time to learn new things. The brain loves to grow.  It just does.  Give it material by taking up new pursuits.   Maybe you’ve always wanted to sew or take great photos or grow corn or make stained glass. Do it! Take up an instrument, study a language, read about the lands you want to visit and make paper plans to go there.   If you find you’re not enjoying it, dump that pursuit and move on.  Easy! (You might make a new friend, too.)  Last year, I studied cello for awhile and studied Spanish (ongoing). This year, I’m planning an urban farm for my backyard and having a blast.  (This week, I built frames out of PVC pipe for my grow lights. Me! I did it myself!  It’s true that the ends were crooked because I couldn’t figure out how to cut them straight, but they were stuck into elbows and joints so it didn’t matter anyway.)

Do-over

Do not regret your life or spend time wishing you could change things.  Forgive yourself and others the best you can and keep moving forward. We are who we are because of who we’ve been, and you are pretty amazing just as you are.  Just ask P!nk.

Thanks so much Barbara! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Barbara, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook and Twitter!

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Megan Crane's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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We don't know what we love the most...the cover, the title or the plot of Megan Crane's latest novel, I Love the 80's. We think we'll just say all of the above! I Love the 80's is the story of Jenna Jenkins, an eighties lover whose fiance dumps her for a 22-year-old yoga instructor! And after a freak accident, she's transported back in time to her favorite decade. She finds herself smack in 1987 and face-to-face with the man she was madly in love with-pop legend Tommy Seer (who never knew she existed) and she must convince him that they are meant to be together...before he dies in a tragic car crash that only she knows is coming.

When we think about where we were in 1987, the year we met, we laugh at all the hilarious memories.  This book took us right back to the days of grown out perms, bushy brows, Lisa's red "Sally Jesse Raphael" glasses, cassette tapes and stirrup pants (oy vey)! And if you leave a comment today, you can win one of five copies of this entertaining and hilarious novel. We'll randomly select the winner after 6:00 PM, EST on Thursday, March 24th.

 

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS...MEGAN CRANE'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER:

 

5 Do's and 1 (Sort Of) Do-Over Should You Find Yourself Back in 1987

1. DO just go with the fashion nightmare that is 1987. You may be the only one who knows you're wearing those neon stirrup pants ironically, but that's okay.

2. DO prepare yourself for the tech revolution in advance. Apple, Microsoft, Silicon Valley's finest. A little research could yield huge rewards. Just think--you could come back to the present to find yourself a zillionaire!

3. DO try to enjoy yourself. It's tempting to loom about worried about how you'll make it home, but that defeats the purpose of having time-traveled at all, doesn't it? It's 1987 and only you know what happens next--and what doesn't. Try to immerse yourself in the local stonewashed culture, secure in your superior knowledge of what happens to all those synthesizer-heavy bands come the Grunge movement.

4. DO accept that your hair is going to be out of control. COMPLETELY out of control. Member of Heart back in the day out of control. You can't do anything about it this far away from your favorite products. Just tease and smile.

5. You shouldn't attempt to DO OVER your own life, even though, yes, it's 1987 and you could change it all if you could just talk to your middle-school self. And you COULD talk to yourself, because you're back in time and you know how it all works out. But when did you listen to anyone when you were in middle school? And do you really want to see how little all the monsters of your memory really are? Better by far to stay away and let you grow up to be you. Time travel can be fun and rewarding--but not if you're out to reinvent your own life. Because you saw all those movies--what happens if you go back to the future and you're someone else?

To find out more about one of our favorite authors, Megan Crane (and her other novels- she also writes romance novels under the name, Caitlin Crews), visit her website and follow her on Facebook. And don't forget to buy her book, I Love the 80's.

Thanks, Megan!

xoxo,

L&L

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Jackie Collins' 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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Just like a familiar song or your favorite pair of jeans, you know you can always count on a Jackie Collins novel to make you feel good. They're always entertaining, saucy and damn fun! (The stats are uh-maze-ing: Twenty-eight NYT bestsellers & 400 million copies sold in 40 countries!) So with Poor Little Bitch Girl, (now out in paperback) we knew we were in for yet another sexy read that would no doubt include her always absorbing tales of the wealth, power and Hollywood glamour. Here's a synopsis of Poor Little Bitch Girl (so love typing that title!):

Denver Jones is a hotshot twenty-something attorney working in L.A. Carolyn Henderson is personal assistant to a powerful and very married Senator in Washington with whom she is having an affair. And Annabelle Maestro—daughter of two movie stars—has carved out a career for herself in New York as the madame of choice for discerning famous men. The three of them went to high school together in Beverly Hills—and although Denver and Carolyn have kept in touch, Annabelle is out on her own with her cocaine addicted boyfriend, Frankie.

Then there is Bobby Santangelo Stanislopolous, the Kennedyesque son of Lucky Santangelo and deceased Greek shipping billionaire, Dimitri Stanislopolous. Bobby owns Mood, the hottest club in New York.  Back in the day he went to high school with Denver, Carolyn and Annabelle. And he connected with all three of them. Frankie is his best friend.

When Annabelle’s beautiful movie star mother is found shot to death in the bedroom of her Beverly Hills mansion, the five of them find themselves thrown together . . . and secrets from the past have a way of coming back to haunt everyone. . . .

And you know the drill, ladies (and gents). Just leave a comment here and be entered to win one of five copies of Poor Little Bitch Girl. We'll randomly select the winners after 6:00 P.M., EST on Friday, March 18th.

We are beside ourselves to have such a legend (did we mention twenty-eight NYT bestsellers?) answering our 5 Do's and a Do-Over! (We love them all-but especially #1 & #3 & Lisa is particularly good at #4!)

Can we have a majuh drum roll please....

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS....JACKIE COLLINS' 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER:

5 Do's

1.  Do something you love to do every day. Something that makes you feel good and puts you in a fantastic mood.  Everyone has different needs, so decide what will do it for you.  Working out?  Making love?  Drinking a cup of your favorite coffee?  Go for it!!  My heroines always do, and they come out on top!

2.  Clear out your closet every six months. Rule of thumb - if you haven't worn it in a year - it's history!  So be ruthless.  Trust me, when it's done you will feel so free and ready for some major shopping!  No regrets.

3.  Do make a list of six things you wish to achieve every week - one a day - with Sunday off.  You will be surprised how much you can achieve if you write it down.

4.  Do indulge yourself once a week by just doing nothing. And by doing nothing I mean just sitting around with no pressure, maybe reading a book or mindlessly watching junk T.V.  I am a TiVo junkie, and catching up on shows nobody else watches (or pretends they don't) is totally relaxing.  Never feel guilty for doing nothing.

5.  Do tell the people you love how special they are. Life is fragile, and words of love are deeply precious and never regretted.  Treat others the way you would like them to treat you.  And remember - forgiveness makes you feel amazing and frees the soul.  Karma is a powerful thing.

Do Over

You know, I have lived a very exciting and full life surrounded by fascinating people.  A do over?  I don't think so. We are what we make of ourselves and I have worked hard to become who I am today.

To read more about the truly amazing Jackie Collins, visit her website, follow her on Twitter and join the 70,000+ who already like her on Facebook.

Thanks so much, Jackie!

xoxo, Liz & Lisa

 

 

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Ellen Meister's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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We've come to many forks in the road in our lives.  Whether it was deciding between two job offers out of college and meeting your soulmate at the one you did choose(Liz!) or deciding to do a second internship that led to an illustrious career. (Lisa!) Or when we put our hesitations aside and launched Chick Lit is Not Dead. It's decisions like these that shape our lives. But what if we had decided differently?   And if you had the chance to take a peek into what that other life looked like, would you? We're ecstatic to have the fab Ellen Meister sharing her Do's and a Do-over on the site today.  Her third book,The Other Life, is a thoughtful and engrossing novel that we weren't able to put down.

Happily married and pregnant, Quinn Braverman has an ominous secret. Every time she makes a major life decision, she knows an alternate reality exists in which she made the opposite choice—not only that, she knows how to cross over. But even in her darkest moments—like her mother's suicide—Quinn hasn't been tempted to slip through...until she receives devastating news about the baby she's carrying.

The grief lures her to peek across the portal, and before she knows it she's in the midst of the other life: the life in which she married another man and is childless. The life in which her mother is still very much alive.

Quinn is forced to make a heartbreaking choice. Will she stay with the family she loves and her severely disabled child or rediscover her exciting single life and reconnect with one person she thought she’d lost forever-her mother. But Quinn can’t have both lives. Soon, she must decide which she really wants—the one she has…or the other life?

We highly recommend The Other Life and have FIVE copies to give away to lucky readers!  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win!  Yep, it's that easy.  We'll choose the winners after 6pm PST on Thursday, March 17th.

And we think you'll love her Do's and a Do-over.  She provided photographic evidence!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: ELLEN MEISTER'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

DO'S

1. Listen to your mother, no matter how old you are. She's always right.

2. Leave the dirty dishes in the sink ... to get up and dance ... or make love ... or take a phone call from a friend. The dishes will still be there when you're done.

3. Say yes to the things that scare you. You will never regret facing your fears.

4.  Spend more time with the people you enjoy and less time with the people you don't. Life's too short.

5. Say "I love you" the moment you think it.

DO-OVER

Despite that I wrote THE OTHER LIFE, a novel about a woman with the ultimate "Do-over" (my protagonist gets to slip through a portal to the life she would have had if she never got married and had a child), I try not to indulge in regrets. Indeed, I'm one of those people who believes that whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger.

Still, I've never been able look back with any fondness on a certain spiky, henna-drenched, 1980's mullet ...

I'm attaching a suitably ridiculous photo!

You were rocking that mullet, Ellen! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Ellen, head on over to her website or find her on Twitter and Facebook.

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Cavanaugh Lee's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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Fact:  Liz is addicted to her Crackberry Blackberry. Whether she's working, playing or pretending to be paying attention in a meeting, she's always just waiting for that little red asterisk to pop up.  And Lisa's not much better-she loves her iPhone so much that's she's found a way to send emails from it while pumping breast milk.  Now that's talent! So when Save as Draft by Cavanaugh Lee landed on our doorstop last month-we were intrigued to read about Izabell's online adventures.  And we were happy to discover it was a fun and sassy read that we gobbled up in just a few days.

A love triangle evolving over e-mails, texts, and Facebook messages that makes you wonder if the things we leave unsaid—or rather unsent—could change the story of our lives. Izabell is a wactress (waitress/actress) turned lawyer who lives her life online. (Don’t we all these days?)

She's got this problem. . . . There’s this guy. His name’s Peter. He’s her best friend and co-worker, and she just started dating, which is potentially a huge mistake. But, that’s not all. There’s this other guy, Marty. She met him on eHarm, and he ran with the bulls in Spain. She can’t get him off her mind. What a mess.

Sounds fun, right? We have FIVE copies to give away!  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win!  we'll choose the winners Sunday March 13th after 1pm PST.

And we're thrilled that Cavanaugh is sharing her Do's and a Do-over for the Electronic age.  Because, I think we all have a few friends on Facebook that could benefit from her advice!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: CAVANAUGH LEE'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

5 DO’S

1.  DO make sure you’re actually communicating and not just “communicating.” I mean, really, say what you mean and mean what you say.  Ask yourself these questions as you type any critical email:

a.    Has all this technology made it easier or harder to communicate?

b.     Are we using it to express ourselves more fully, or to edit/fabricate ourselves?

c.     Are we communicating more when we write hundreds of emails a day, or are we actually not saying anything at all?

d.     If we spend hours crafting the perfectly witty email, have we told the truth?

e.     Are we hiding behind an “electronic spine” as our fingers press the keys?

f.      Have we sacrificed a genuine connection in favor of a wireless connection?

2.  If you like someone, DO email: “I like you” (or something to that effect). If you don’t like someone, DO type: “I’m just not that into you.”  You may only get one shot to “just hit send,” and email is not the place to toy with someone’s emotions.  Along those same lines, DO think twice before asking someone out via email (same goes for asking for someone’s hand in marriage) and DO think twice before breaking up with someone via email.  How about doing it in person instead?  I mean, don’t you want to see their face?  J

3.  DO use the Bcc (“blind carbon copy”) button wisely – it’s a rather devious mechanism. It can get you in trouble as can the “Reply to All” (Oops!).

4.   DO delete anyone who has broken your heart from your Contacts page. Not deleting them can result in emailing “under the influence” which can further result in massive disaster.  DO avoid it at all costs.  In fact, install “Mail Goggles” which you can find in G-Mail under “Settings” + “Labs.”  Again, delete, delete, delete… and don’t look back.

5.  DO empty your Trash folder every so often. It is masochistic to re-read it.

 

DO-OVER

DON’T “Save as Draft,” unless it’s a nasty-gram to your boss (of course if you’re about to quit your job for a better one – send it – kidding).  See #1 under DO’S for the reason.  All of this electronic technology is both good and bad, depending on how we use it.  Saving as draft means you’re holding back.  Life is too short

Thanks Cavanaugh! xoxo, L&L

To read more about Cavanaugh, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook and Twitter.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Stacy Morrison's 5 Do's and a Do-over

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One of our favorite books that we read devoured last year is now out in paperback! Falling Apart In One Piece: One Optimist's Journey Through the Hell of Divorce by Stacy Morrison is an honest and emotionally charged memoir that will make you think twice before you complain about your own life. It's an amazing story of learning how to let go of what you thought your life was going to be when it takes an unexpected turn that threatens to throw you into a permanent fetal position.
Here's a synopsis: Just when Stacy Morrison thought everything in her life had come together, her husband of ten years announced that he wanted a divorce. She was left alone with a new house that needed a lot of work, a new baby who needed a lot of attention, and a new job in the high-pressure world of New York magazine publishing.

 

Morrison had never been one to believe in fairy tales. As far as she was concerned, happy endings were the product of the kind of ambition and hard work that had propelled her to the top of her profession. But she had always considered her relationship with her husband a safe place in her often stressful life. All of her assumptions about how life works crumbled, though, when she discovered that no amount of will and determination was going to save her marriage. For Stacy, the only solution was to keep on living, and to listen -- as deeply and openly as possible -- to what this experience was teaching her. Told with humor and heart, her honest and intimate account of the stress of being a working mother while trying to make sense of her unraveling marriage offers unexpected lessons of love, forgiveness, and dignity that will resonate with women everywhere.

And if you leave a comment here, you'll be entered to win one of five copies of Falling Apart in One Piece- out in paperback March 15th! We'll randomly select the winners after 6pm PST on Thursday, March 10th. 

 

Just like her memoir, Stacy Morrison's answers to the 5 Do's and a Do-over are honest, humorous and include life lessons that we'll definitely take to heart. (And Lisa couldn't agree more with #4 on Stacy's list. Remember when she drove cross country for love?)

CHICKLIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: STACY MORRISON'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER:

DO 1) Move to a new city at least once, preferably on a whim I've been in New York City for -- egad! -- twenty-one years now. Since I had wanted to be a magazine editor since I was very young, I always knew this is the city where I would end up. But I had a moment in the last dot com era (circa 2000) where a fantastic dream job opened up in San Francisco. Two weeks after my first conversation with the company, I accepted the position and then moved to San Francisco by myself two weeks later (my then-husband followed a few months after that). I was a bit terrified and had absolutely no idea what I was doing -- no place to live, had to buy a car, didn't know the neighborhoods -- but I was completely energized, awake and alive in my life in a startling and wonderful new way. I still remember driving my rental car around the city, sun sparkling down on the hood, singing at the top of my lungs because I was so excited to be discovering a whole new world, a whole new me. Absolutely everything was new, except my clothes (though I did have to buy some sensible shoes for walking around all those hills), and every day was packed with discovery and excitement. In the end, the job and the city didn't take (thank you, stock market!), but the experience of having pulled up my roots and boogied out of town showed me that whatever new idea I dream up for my life, I can do it.

2) Embrace heartbreak One of my greatest pieces of luck is that I'm wired to run toward life experiences that scare me. And I don't mean hang-gliding -- though I did do that once in Brazil, strapped to a man who didn't even speak English, and wow! It was amazing! But I found that in my 20 years as a magazine editor, I learned more from failure than from success. (Half of the magazines I helped launch aren't being published anymore.) Same is true for me for matters of the heart. When my husband of ten years ended our marriage -- when our son was 10 months old, and right as I was taking over Redbook magazine -- I went into a total tailspin. Until I remembered to pay attention to what I was learning, the same way I always had in all the terrifying work situations that come up when you're launching a magazine. What I experienced in my divorce changed me so deeply, in a good way, that I now say my divorce is the best thing that ever happened to me: At last I know that what comes my way in life is no statement about who I am or what I deserve; it's just what came next.

3) Go ahead and spend money on your hair I am vain about my hair. I did the math once on how much I was spending on my hair a year -- what with highlights to keep the blonde going and regular trims -- and I almost had a heart attack. Modesty (or is it shame?) prevents me from telling you the amount, but let's just say it was about a Starbucks a day. But then I thought about the jolt of a cup of caffeine compared to the simply fantastic sensation of feeling even mildly attractive on my worst day because my hair looks good: Well, let me tell you, I started brewing at home and never looked back. Some people spend money on a fancy handbag to get the same confidence boost, but I say if you can't hold your investment up against your face and have it make you look better in a photo for time immemorial -- forever! --  then you're not getting your money's worth.

4) Drive across America I've driven cross-country three different times -- once in seven weeks, another time in three days -- but each experience just blew me away: Dusty roadside diners, amazing natural monuments, an improbable variety of vegetation and climate, local sodas and sandwiches, cities sparkling in the distance in the night, and miles and miles and miles of vast emptiness dotted with worn-for-the-wear towns filled with friendly people. And everywhere you go, there's the company of tractor-trailers and gas-station dogs sleeping in the sun. Each drive was its own anthem and made me love this country in a much more intimate way.

5) Swim naked All we women trundle around in our lives with a never-ending lists of to-dos and shoulds and "I gottas." We may try yoga, wine or Twitter to help us shake the constant pressure of this inner conversation, but back it comes -- usually waking us up from a perfectly good sleep in the middle of the night. I can't say I have a cure for this, but I do know this: When I am deep in the embrace of nature, I hear nothing but the wind in the trees and my heart beating in my chest, and all I feel is that everything in life is just as it should be. Where does the swimming naked come in? Like this: Drive to the mountains, rent a canoe, paddle four or five lakes away from the outfitter's cabin where you rented the canoe, find a small island campground in the middle of a shimmering body of water surrounded by tall trees and strip down to nothing and dive in. Swim out toward the middle of the lake. Tread water, kicking and turning slowly around and around and around, trying to take in all the ageless glory and grandeur. There's something about the being naked -- with nothing to separate me from everything else -- that makes me feel like I really belong here, whether my to-dos are to-done or not. Humble majesty.

Do-Over: As a general rule, I regret nothing (see #2 above). I mean, yes, I've embarrassed myself in front of the President of the United States (George W; it's in the book), got busted for stealing M&Ms off a birthday cake in first grade (and was thus stripped of my Class President title), missed my ballet recital when I was 8 (that still hurts), cried like a baby in front of my two-year-old son when my marriage was ending, wasted a lot of money in my failed move to San Francisco (see #1 above), bombed at a celebrity interview (can't tell you who; she'll hunt me down) and desperately wished I could help my parents die easier deaths in the last year. But I truly believe there's no point in a do-over; we have to take the bad with the good -- and we should want to. As my favorite poet Rainer Marie Rilke says, "The point is to live everything." Live it all and take it in, and realize that the wincing moments and "mistakes" and the tragedies of our lives are like rogue waves: they overwhelm us for a moment or longer, and turn us upside-down, but when they retreat they leave the sparkling gifts of compassion and wisdom and grace on the beach for us to discover, life's little treasures. (Plus, you always need a good "Can you believe I did this?" story at a cocktail party, you know? Helps break the ice.)

To find out more about the lovely and incredibly talented Stacy Morrison, visit her website and follow her on Facebook.

Thanks, Stacy!

xoxo,

Liz & Lisa

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Gigi Levangie Grazer's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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We first fell for Gigi Levangie Grazer after reading her delicious novel, The Starter Wife. And we were beyond thrilled when it was made into a miniseries starring the fabulous Debra Messing. So when we found out she'd written another book, Queen Takes King, we knew that not only did we want to read it (and we did and we devoured it in both the hardback and the paperback reprint edition) but that we wanted to have her as a guest here at Chick Lit Is Not Dead to be a part of our new series, 5 Do's and a Do-Over. We knew she'd be just as funny and entertaining in her answers as she is in her writing (and of course she was! -More on that in a minute). But first, if you haven't already, you must read all of Levangie Granger's books, but especially her sassy and hilarious novel, Queen Takes King about Jackson and Cynthia Powers, a high-powered Upper West Side couple feuding over their divorce. The premise: Jacks Power falls for another woman, Lara Sizemore, and wants a divorce so he can marry her, but his wife Cynthia isn't ready to let him- or his real estate empire- off the hook that easily! Publisher's Weekly calls it "The War of The Roses fought by The Desperate Housewives of New York" and we couldn't agree more. Read an excerpt here.

And if you leave a comment here today, you'll be entered to win one of five copies! We'll randomly select the winners after 6:00 p.m. EST on Friday, March 4th.

We heart Gigi even more after reading her 5 Do's and, instead of a Do-Over, her Do-not because they are LOL funny. (And you know we don't LOL over just anything or anyone!) Check out what she says about having kids (Lisa- who just had a baby- may just all Auntie G to babysit), why you should laugh at everything- including testicular cancer- and why she quotes Kanye West!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: GIGI GRANGER'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER DO-NOT:

Five Things You Most Definitely Should – no, HAVE TO Do:

1. Do follow your dream. Okay, fine. But what IS your dream? Start with this: What did you want to do with your life when you were eight years old? When I was eight, all I was good at, all I wanted to do, was read and make up stories (and act, but that’s a whole other traumatic phase)…it so happens that reading and making up stories still gives me a lift, still makes me excited about my day, still gives me hope. Following your dream is better than a lifetime supply of Xanax. Which is what you’ll need if you don’t stay true to yourself.

Ask your eight-year-old self; mine is a chubby little crybaby, but she had the answer.

2. Do have a baby. Have any baby. Have your own, adopt, become a stepmom. Babies are delicious, they smell good (about 75% of the time), they’re fun to bathe, they’re an excellent conversation starter, and a great excuse not to go places and see people you don’t want to see. You want to be in the “now”, in the “present”? Don’t read the book, have a baby.

If you have the love, have the means, have the good public school system, have a frikkin’ baby, already. (Unless you’re still in high school – in which case, have the baby, then send the baby to Auntie G – that’s me.)

But talk to me before you have three or four babies.

3. Do get married. After my first divorce, I swore I’d never get married again. What happened? I got married again. After my second divorce, I knew never to say never. Ever. Because I know myself. I love being single, but damn it, I love being married. I do divorce so well, that my wasband and I have a great relationship. But here’s the thing – I get more work done when I’m married. I’m more calm when I’m married. More organized. Being single is fun and interesting and you get to meet and flirt with all kinds of men, and basically, you become like a kid in a candy store – which means, you become annoying to everyone, including yourself. If I were married right now, I would be finished with the second draft of my next book, already.

Also, husbands are really nice to snuggle with. But stick to your own.

4. Do learn to cook. I remember coming home from school, and our apartment being filled with the aroma of my dad’s Italian sausage sauce, which had been simmering on the stove for hours. That is pure happiness, my friends. A good home cooked pasta dish can make up for a lot of family grievances.

There’s a lot of benefits to making your own dinner, too – it’s healthier, it’s a lot cheaper than take-out, and there’s nothing that makes a house a home like a home-cooked meal (or if Usher moved in, say.)

Get the best cut of meat you can afford, the best piece of salmon, the plumpest chicken, the freshest vegetables. Pop a few potatoes in the oven for an hour. Always keep olive oil and butter on hand, and that coarse sea salt.

Cooking is not a mystery, but let’s not make it drudgery, either. So, okay, don’t cook every night. Find a few good take-out places (with good coupons).

And by the way, I’ve yet to meet the man who doesn’t appreciate a woman who can cook. If you can roast a chicken, or bake an apple pie, and you have ESPN in HD, you can have your pick of the litter. Wrinkles? Thunder thighs? Who cares? Bake it, and he will come.

5. Do laugh your ass off. Funny people are the best medicine. Surround yourself with them. Feed them, encourage them, berate them, if you must. It may take some cajoling, a little cash, or a couple margaritas. Find people who laugh at your jokes – there’s no one quite as fascinating as the person who finds you fascinating.

Find the funny, even in the most dire of circumstances. When my nephew went in for surgery after we learned he had testicular cancer, it took about ten minutes to start calling him “the Uniballer.” I bought him a new, improved ball for Christmas that year. And of course, we joked about that, too.

Life is too tough not to laugh at it.

----

“Let’s have a toast to the jerkoffs, that’ll never take work off…” Kanye West, Runaway.

1. Like Kanye says, Do Not pay attention to the assholes. This is what my father, whom I call ‘Gran Torino’ always said: “What people think of you is none of your business.” Live by this rule, and you will be a happier, more productive person.

Don’t waste time, energy, ideas, money, tears, words or lawyers bills on negative people. Even if you are in the right. Men, women, strangers, even close friends – some people just don’t want to see you be happy or succeed. There’s always going to be someone who doesn’t like you, who doesn’t approve of your looks, your personality, your sexuality, your very being. Well, this isn’t junior high (unless you live in L.A., where it’s always junior high), so get over it. Let them hate you. And let it make you stronger.

Your continued happiness will befuddle and amaze them.

To read more about the fabulous and talented Gigi Levangie Grazer, check out her website, follow her on Twitter (a recent tweet that made us laugh: I want Charlie Sheen to be my life coach) and become a fan on Facebook.

Thanks, Gigi!

xoxo,

Liz & Lisa

 

 

 

 

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Jill Mansell's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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Have we mentioned that we are LOVIN' this new feature?  We've been blown away by the funny and poignant Do's and Do-overs of our favorite authors and we hope that you guys are enjoying it as much as we are. Today we're thrilled to have beloved Chick-Lit Brit Jill Mansell, an international bestselling author with 21 novels and over 5 million copies sold worldwide. Her latest, Staying at Daisy's(out TOMORROW, March 1st) is a fun, delicious read!

Hotel Manager Daisy MacLean sees a lot of people come and go; unfortunately it always seems to cause chaos.The arrival of her friend Tara's ex-boyfriend Dominic doesn't seem to worry Daisy-after all Tara promised nothing would happen, as he's getting married at the hotel. His best man, on the other hand, Dev, is the one guest Daisy could do without.  He is arrogant and sarcastic-but also incredibly sexy.  Daisy tries to steer clear of him, yet soon realizes he is the one guest she can't bear to see leave.

In this fast-paced novel with multiple lovable characters, Daisy learns to look past first impressions and that most people are not who they seem to be, whether for better or worse.

Sounds fun, right?  We've got FIVE copies to give away!  Y'all know the drill-leave a comment and you'll be entered to win.  We'll choose a winner on Thursday night after 6pm PST.  Good Luck!

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: JILL MANSELL'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

Hello Liz and Lisa, and thank you so much for inviting me back!

5 Do's

1.  The first of my five fantastic moments is the time we bought the bear who lives in our fireplace. Last year our family visited a shopping village and saw a bear on sale, five feet tall and with a very cute face. (He isn’t real, I hasten to add.) I fell in love with him at first sight and my husband asked me if I’d like the bear as my birthday present. Of course the answer was YES. The ensuing ten minutes are a memory I shall always treasure – my teenage son had to carry the enormous bear on his shoulder through the crowded shopping village whilst EVERYONE stared and laughed, and dogs danced around him barking like crazy.  My bear only just fitted into the car, but we managed to get him home. He now stands guard in our fireplace and is one of my favourite possessions. He doesn’t have a name, apart from Bear, but he does like to dress up a bit for Christmas and has a collection of jaunty hats for the rest of the year. He also likes having his photo taken...

2.  Another brilliant memory is the moment I knew writing had changed my life. After years of having books published but not selling very many of them and struggling financially, we were having a cheap few days’ holiday in a pretty grotty caravan (trailer!) in Cornwall. I was standing outside on the steps of the trailer when my agent rang to tell me my publishers had just offered a life-altering amount of money for my next contract. I vividly remember gazing around at our not very picturesque trailer park and thinking: I am never EVER going to stay in a caravan again...

(Except we did, because our children loved those holidays and pleaded with us not to stop!)

3.  Here’s a must-do that doesn’t cost money. Organ transplants feature in my new book, and when I worked in a hospital my work was often connected with transplantation. I’ve been on the organ transplant register myself for many years, and also the bone marrow register. Four years ago I was contacted by them and told that I appeared to be a good match for someone currently very ill with leukaemia. I then went for further tests and waited for the results from the lab...

Unfortunately I wasn’t a good enough match and they weren’t able to harvest my bone marrow for this patient, but the reason I’m talking about it now is because I hadn’t anticipated how thrilled and honoured I would feel when I thought there was a chance I might be able to help someone in this way. It was a highlight of my life and I really recommend it to all of you. I’m still on the register and would love another chance to make such a difference to another person’s life.

4.  At the risk of sounding like an advert, having my eyes lasered is something else I’m really pleased I had done. Contact lenses are a nuisance and I didn’t enjoy wearing glasses. Like most people I’m squeamish about eyes and the thought of having laser surgery made my toes curl, but it wasn’t as bad as I’d imagined. The next morning I woke up and could see perfectly. It was a truly wondrous moment. My handy hint though, if you’re considering it, is not to have it done the week before Christmas, like I did. You aren’t allowed to wear ANY eye make-up AT ALL for a fortnight afterwards...

5.  My new book, Staying at Daisy’s, is set in a country house hotel in the Cotswolds. The hotel and setting are based on the Manor House Hotel in Castle Combe. It must have been twenty years ago now, but we’d read a stellar restaurant review of the place and decided to go there for the first time, for a lunch to celebrate my birthday. The sun was shining and the hotel, the dining room and the food were all sublime, like nothing we’d ever experienced before. At one stage during the meal I remember I almost burst into tears because it was all so amazing and I was so happy to be there.

Since then I’ve become more accustomed to excellent cuisine, but the Manor House is still my favourite place to go. Here’s a link to the website so you can see what I’m drooling about: www.manorhouse.co.uk (And no, they aren’t paying me to say this either!)

So if you read my new book you can now see where the story has been set...

Do-Over

And finally we reach my Do-over. Equally memorable but in a less lovely way, it was a visit to another restaurant. This was when I was single and still working in a hospital, counting every penny to get by. On the way back from a medical conference in London, our consultant psychiatrist boss announced that we should stop somewhere for dinner and pulled into the car-park of a nice restaurant. I had about three pounds in my purse and no credit card. Appalled, I knew I couldn’t afford this. But if I told him that, he would feel obliged to pay for my meal. So I had to pretend I wasn’t hungry and ordered the very cheapest item on the menu, which was a minuscule potato pancake on the starter menu. I had to visit the bathroom to count all the change in my purse and make sure I had enough money to pay for it. Then I pretended I was too full for a main course and sat there sipping tap water while the others all ate their way through the menu and ordered bottles of wine.

At the end of the meal, needless to say, my boss announced that he was taking care of the bill and charging it to expenses...

Thanks Jill!  xoxo, L&L

To read more about Jill, head on over to her website or find her on Twitter and Facebook!

 

 

Fake Blonde & New Mommy Don't Mix!

So, I was supposed to get my hair done today. Just as I've done every seven weeks for as long as I can remember.

Well, I had to cancel.

Something I've never done in as long as I can remember.

New mommyhood= new (hair and otherwise) challenges.

When I made the appointment, I was about to pop. I remember laughing with the woman at the front desk who was also prego with her first. I'll be here- NO. MATTER. WHAT. Nothing can come between me and my hair! Not even my baby! Bah ha ha ha.

Cut to today as I sheepishly cancel my appointment-- the morning of.

Who does that?

I suppose a new mommy does. Or at least THIS new mommy does.

When would you like to reschedule?

Um, er, uh...

I felt a wave of panic come over me. Would I now be that blonde? The one with, gulp, roots for days?  Would I, gasp, have to start doing my own hair, like with hair dye from a box? What was next? Wine from the box?

I'd always pictured myself svelte (any brilliant ideas on how to get rid of my new spare tire are welcomed!), fashionable (is spit up the new black?) and put together (no roots, no overgrown cuticles and no claws for toe nails) in my post-baby life.

But I guess for now I'd settle for showered.

xoxo,

Lisa

PS: This post was inspired by my friend Lisa and her own hair catastrophe which she wrote about on her hilarious blog, Baby Mama Jams. Check it out- it's full of funny mommy anecdotes, fabulous flea market finds, brilliant DIY projects and more!

PSS: If you leave a comment, you'll be entered to win a $15.00 e-Gift card from Barnes and Noble. We'll select the winner on Friday after 6:00 p.m. EST.

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Sarah Pekkanen's 5 Do's and a Do-Over

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We. Love. Sarah. Pekkanen. There-it's out in the open now.  We've been huge fans since her off-the-charts debut, The Opposite of Me. (Fun fact: she was our first author interview EVEH on CLIND!) Since then, we've been eagerly anticipating her follow-up, Skipping a Beat. And it did not disappoint!  We couldn't put it down and someone (Liz!) may have even bawled her eyes out for the last three chapters.  But even though Skipping a Beat can reach even the most emotionally unavailable robot with it's pitch-perfect insights on love and marriage, it's also a funny and heartwarming story that will have you thinking about it long after you finish.  Check out the book trailer for it here!

What would you do if your husband wanted to rewrite the rules of your relationship?

Julia Dunhill, a thirty-something party planner, seems to have it all: Married to her high school sweetheart and living in a gorgeous home in Washington D.C., she imagines her future unfolding very much as it has for the past few years, since she and her husband Michael successfully launched their companies.  But in her darker moments, she worries that her marriage has dissolved from a true partnership into a façade, but she convinces herself it’s due to the intensity of their careers and fast-paced lifestyle.

So as she arranges the molten chocolate cupcakes for the annual Opera benefit, how can she know that her carefully-constructed world is about to fall apart? That her husband will stand up from the head of the table in his company’s boardroom, open his mouth to speak, and crash to the carpeted floor… all in the amount of time it will take her to walk across a ballroom floor just a few miles away. Four minutes and eight seconds after his cardiac arrest, a portable defibrillator jump-starts Michael’s heart. But in those lost minutes he becomes a different man, with an altered perspective on the rarified life they’ve been living and a determination to regain the true intimacy they once shared.  Now it is up to Julia to decide — is it worth upending her comfortable world to try to find her way back to the husband she once adored, or should she walk away from this new Michael, who truthfully became a stranger to her long before his change of heart?

We LOVED Skipping a Beat-do yourself a favor and pre-order it RIGHT NOW (or pick it up at your favorite bookstore tomorrow, Tuesday February 22nd).  And check out her Do's and a Do-Over and you'll understand why Sarah had us at hello.

We also have FIVE copies to give away to lucky readers!  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win-how damn easy is that? We'll pick the winners on Thursday night after 6pm PST.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: SARAH PEKKANEN'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

5 Do's

1. Backpack through Europe After college, I threw some clothes and a Eurorail pass into a backpack and set off alone for three months. I was too young to be nervous; I was certain I'd have an amazing adventure, and I did! I slept on a sidewalk in Portugal with a group of Canadian travelers (we woke up to find stray dogs nuzzling up with us); arrived in Switzerland at a deserted train station late at night only to realize I had no money, had taken in the last train, and had no idea how to get to the hostel; and watched sunsets in Greece with a handsome rugby player from New Zealand. Sigh.

2.  Ask a girl out I'm not getting all Katy Perry on you - I mean it in a platonic way. There was a Mom at my kids' preschool who seemed like so much fun. She was always smiling and I loved chatting with her in the hallways, but I never took it to the next level. One day my husband said, "I think Rachel likes you. You guys should go out!" So I invited her out for drinks, and we spent the whole night laughing. Now she's one of the closest friends I've ever had.

3. Get a two-hour massage Pure decadence. It seems counter-intuitive, but there's nothing quite as relaxing as having a complete stranger rub your naked body with hot oil. After I sold my first book, I lay down on a table and experienced a hundred and twenty minutes of bliss. I felt like I was floating for days afterwards!

4.  Rescue a dog Stop counting calories - adopt a dog instead and keep eating cupcakes! You'll get an hour or more a day of brisk walking and you'll love doing it. My lab Bella is the sweetest creature alive, and even on cold winter mornings, I look forward to taking her out. I've gotten to know my neighbors and I notice little things in nature that I'd otherwise never see.

5.  Sing with a rock band I went to see the Rock Bottom Remainders - a surprisingly good band made up of authors Dave Barry, Scott Turow, Amy Tan, Mitch Albom, and guest singer Jennifer Weiner - in Philadelphia last year. It was a charity concert, and one of the auction items was a chance to sing back up on "Wild Thing." I won it and even though I can't carry a tune, I got up there and sang my heart out, then threw my kazoo into the crowd. (Surprising trivia: Amy Tan wore a Lady Gaga-style wig and at one point, began spanking the male members of the band. Had not expected to see that side of her!) One of the best nights of my life!

1 Do-over

I'd appreciate college so much more if I could do it again! I'd pay attention in classes instead of staring at cute boys, get to know more people, and learn more about myself. I went to college at 17 and was pretty young emotionally, and only now do I realize how much more I could have gotten out of the experience.

Thanks Sarah!  xo, L&L

To read more about Sarah, head on over to her website or find her on Twitter and Facebook.

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Emily Giffin's 5 Dos and a Do-Over

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Today is a VERY special day.  And it's not just because we have the incredibly awesome EMILY GIFFIN debuting our brand spankin' new feature, Five Do's and a Do-Over.  Or that we are giving away cool stuff, including a FLIP VIDEO CAMERA and FIVE copies of  Heart of the Matter(due out in paperback on March 15th).  It's because we are also celebrating Chick Lit is not Dead's TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY! Yes, that's right. It's been two years since we bravely launched our first posts having absolutely no damn clue what we were doing!(Click to read Liz and Lisa's)  And since then, we've had such a blast hanging out with y'all.  We might be a bit biased, but we happen to think our readers are freakin' awesome!  So thank you, lovely and loyal ladies(and a few good men!) for taking time out of your incredibly busy lives to stop by to read about ours.  We truly appreciate your support these past two years.  And in case you were wondering, this next year is going to be even bigger and better than the last.

New Features!  More authors!  Bigger giveaways!

And speaking of all those things, it's our pleasure to debut 5 Do's and a Do-Over with one of our ALL-TIME favorite authors.  Not only has Emily Giffin written some of our favorite books, she's also incredibly fun and sassy(Not to mention hawt too!). Her best-selling books occupy prime real estate on our bookshelves and are destined to become Chick Lit classics!

And with the movie version of  Something Borrowed hitting theaters May 6th, (starring Liz's crush John Krasinski!) we've decided that Emily may be the Coolest. Author. EVEH! And stay tuned, because we'll be doing some fun things for the movie too.  But in the meantime, head here for all things SOBO. And make sure to like the official Facebook page for the movie too!

We're ecstatic that Emily agreed to share five things that must be done and one thing she'd like to redo. And once you've read her list, we think you'll be girl-crushing on her as much as we do-it's fantastic!

And OF COURSE we have an awesome giveaway to celebrate!  Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win a Flip video camera or one of FIVE copies of Heart of the Matter! We'll pick the winners after 6pm PST on Sunday February 20th.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: EMILY GIFFIN'S 5 DO'S AND A DO-OVER

5 DO’S

1.  Invest in a quality camera and capture lots of random moments. Other than actually making the memories, there are few things more important to me than recording them. At times I feel as if I'm living the moment through the lens of a camera, but I never regret the photographs later.

2.  Live alone at least once. It is great fun having roommates and I'm a big believer in living with boyfriends if it feels right. And of course, it is wonderful to be married and build a home and life with another person. But I will always cherish the few years of my twenties in which I lived completely alone, and I think everyone should enjoy this serenity and independence at some point in their lives.

3.  Travel somewhere exotic and unexpected. There are certain obvious destinations that everyone should try to see--London, Rome, Paris, the Grand Canyon. But try visiting a place off the beaten path--a place that isn't so obvious and that few, if any, of your family and friends have ventured. For me, this list includes swimming in the Blue Lagoon in Iceland, celebrating Midsummer's Eve on a remote island in Sweden, and wandering through the tiny medieval streets of Bruges. In addition to actually having these experiences, it makes for great cocktail party fodder.

4.  Break a heart and have yours broken. It is part of life and everyone should experience both. So live and love with wild abandon until both happen to you at least once.

5.  Cut bait on toxic friendships. Although there are few things as precious as old friends, don't become so nostalgic and sentimental that you maintain unhealthy ones. Life is too short, and if a "friend" consistently brings you down, then she isn't one. Jettison her and make room for a new one.

1 DO-OVER

One of my favorite quotes is by Mark Twain:

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

I so believe in this, but it took me a while to really internalize the truth of it. I wish I could go back to my twenties and apply this philosophy. Live life a little more on the edge, instead of chasing the next accomplishment and trying to please others. Fortunately, I finally figured this out--which is how I found the courage to quit my job as an attorney, move to London and write my first novel, Something Borrowed. It was a huge risk, but one of the best decisions I have ever made.

Thanks Emily!!! xo, L&L

Want to read more about Emily and see pictures from her last book tour?  Then head here. And don't forget to check her out on Facebook and Twitter-she's a lot of fun!

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Lit IT Girl: Debut Author Karen Bergreen

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Between life, kids, babies, breast pumps, careers and running this site, we've always thought we've had a lot of sh*t on our plates.  But that was before we met our latest Lit IT Girl, Karen Bergreen.  Not only is she a debut author, she's also a stand-up comedian, former lawyer AND stressed-out mom!  We are officially handing our over-committed crown to her! Karen's debut novel shows off her wicked sense of humor.  Following Pollyis the perfect combination of laughter and mystery!

Would you call Alice Teakle a stalker?  Or just someone with an, um, healthy obsession with golden girl Polly Linley Dawson?  No one much notices Alice: not her boss, not the neighbors, not even her Mother.  Besides, everyone follows Polly: her business selling high-end lingerie you can imagine only her elegant self wearing, her all-over-the-social-pages marriage to movie t follows her a little more….closely.

And when she loses her job and starts to follow Polly Dawson one Manhattan autumn afternoon, Alice stumbles on the object of her attention sprawled dead on the floor of a boutique.  Alice is forced to become truly beneath anyone’s notice. Invisible, in fact. Because she’s accused of murder.

But can another obsession help save Alice with the fallout?  Charlie is Alice’s longtime unattainable crush.  He might be able to help her out of the mess she’s in…in return for a favor or two, that is.    And how will Alice find out if Charlie is really the man Alice thinks he is?

We think you'll LOVE this hilarious novel.  That's why we have FIVE copies to give away!  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win.  We'll choose the winners on Friday night after 6pm PST.

And stay tuned-next week we'll be rolling out a new feature with one of your FAVORITE authors.  Can you guess who?

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: LIT IT GIRL KAREN BERGREEN

1. How many agents did you query before you found "the one"? I was very lucky.  A close friend in publishing enjoyed a draft of a novel (never to be published-believe me, it's better this way) to a well-regarded literary agent.  The agent thought I had some talent. I happened to mention my idea for a new novel: a loser with promise becomes addicted to following people, and one of them ends up dead. She urged me to drop the 368-baby I had produced and instead start from scratch.  She took me on.  I felt incredibly lucky.

2. What was your rock bottom moment during the process? I'm glad this is your next question because I am not that lucky.  The agent from the last question (there is no need to learn her name as you will soon realize)  had problems with the book, namely,  I needed a plot. She tried to tell me this, but she couldn't speak my language and I couldn't speak hers.  She dumped me.  I didn't tell anyone for three days.  Not my husband, not my friends, which is a big deal as I am not a private person.  Finally, I told my friend, Victoria Skurnick, the one who had introduced me to the agent to begin with.  Victoria, prominent in publishing, had recently become an agent herself.  She offered to take a look at my plotless novel.  She fell in love with Alice and because she knew me, she knew how to tell me exactly what I needed to do to transform the pages into an actual book.

3. How long did it take to write your book? I wish I could say I wrote it on a napkin at The Olive Garden for the 23 minutes I waited for my Sicilian Scampi, but it was more like two years.

4. What did you do to celebrate your book deal? I stopped hating myself for 24 hours. The best part was this:  Polly in the novel is Alice's arch enemy from college, someone who has prospered in the face of really bad behavior; I have a couple of people like that in my own life and when they asked me "How is that novel of yours going?" I savored saying St. Martin's 2010.

5. Knowing what you know now about publishing your first novel, what would you have done differently? I would have made it about vampires.

6. Who is your writer crush? Susan Isaacs.  And when I met her, I, the chattiest person in town, had absolutely nothing to say.  After twenty minutes I uttered, "Duh, I really liked Almost Paradise."

7.  What's your biggest distraction or vice while writing? You ask the question incorrectly?  It should be: what isn't your biggest distraction while writing? Then I could say, with confidence, "taking my kids to the park."  I hate the park, by the way.  I am likely to be distracted by TV, which is sacred, hunger, boredom, sickness, health, and getting the mail.

8.  GNO drink of choice? champagne or a rich red wine.

9.  Favorite trashy TV show? I don't watch TV. just kidding.  Is the Good Wife considered trashy?  I love that.  I like things that get canceled.  I loved Mercy on NBC.  I was in deep love with James Tupper.

10.  What celeb would you love to have a Twitter war with? Bill Maher because he is the only person I violently agree and disagree with.

Thanks Karen! xo, L&L

To read more about Karen, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook or Twitter.

Mommy Monday: Is Spit Up The New Black?

I'm baaaack. Did you miss me? ;)

It feels good to step out of the "baby cave" for a minute. To be doing something other than debating the merits of sensitive baby wipes vs. regular baby wipes or trying to figure out how to keep a burp cloth clean for longer than five seconds.

Since giving birth to my daughter thirty days ago, I've come to a very important realization. It doesn't matter how many books you read or bad eighties videos you watch in your birthing class, until you actually become a mother, there is no way you can fully comprehend two words.

Sleep. Deprivation.

Sure, everyone tried to warn me while I was still pregnant. Get your sleep now. While you still can. And of course I didn't listen because I was unnaturally obsessed with things like reorganizing the kitchen and cleaning out heating vents.

And now- a month later- although I'm basically running on fumes from the aforementioned lack of shut eye and all of the following things were written in a varying state of delirium (as this post is now), I've recorded some of my other observations from my first month of motherhood:

Day 1- Water breaks at 10:00 p.m. while watching Top Chef. Think I peed my pants. Ask hubs to help me figure it out (I'll let you fill in the blanks on how we did this). Decide this is okay because if I truly am in labor, he's going to potentially see a lot worse once we are at the hospital.

Day 2- If I could do it all over again, I'd skip the Five Guys Burgers and Fries cheeseburger with jalapenos. No fun to have the burger sitting in my stomach while in labor. Tell this story to everyone and anyone who will listen after I've been given my epidural.

Day 3- Nurses keep coming in and marveling at the fact that I'm not 300 lbs with all the Oxycotin I've been taking for my post c-section pain. Can you say Lisa Limbaugh?

Day 4- Totally, deeply and madly in love with my little girl. She is the best thing I have ever done in my life. Hoping when she's old enough to weigh in on that, she'll agree.

Day 5- We're home. Talking to Matt. He says something about Maria. Who's Maria?, I ask. The nurse who helped us every day at the hospital! he exclaims. Oops. Realizing that I don't remember much of my hospital stay. See Day #3- Oxycotin.

Day 6- Up all night. Haven't done this since pulling an all-nighter in college. But at least that involved lots of coffee and sugar and, er, I was only twenty!

Day 7- Check on the baby for the millionth time to make sure she's breathing. Will I ever stop doing this?

Day 8- Decide I have the most beautiful baby in the world. Me and every other mother.

Day 9- Major accomplishment. Can Facebook and breastfeed at the same time. I feel 1/16 human again.

Day 10- Need to remind myself to stop bragging about how good Baby D is. Every time I do this, she decides to throw the schedule we've been keeping out the window as if to say, Don't forget who runs this show, mommy!

Day 11- Discovered I can hide in the shower- if only for a few fleeting moments. Who knew a three minute hot shower could change my life?

Day 12- Thinking about the woman from Africa who's in the documentary, Babies. She gives birth in a hut without medication and minutes later is breast feeding her baby in one arm and hauling water in the other. Remind myself not to get frustrated that my hospital grade breast pump doesn't work perfectly and/or I can't hear my Real Housewives of Beverly Hills episode over the pumping sound.

Day 13- Decide the hubs and I should have our own middle of the night reality show. We make absolutely no sense when we talk to each other because we are never fully awake. I think we're hilarious but not sure anyone else would laugh. Might be worth taping ourselves to find out.

Day 14- Wake up in the middle of the night and frantically search the bed for my baby. This keeps happening. Baby is always safe and sound in crib. Has never slept in our bed. Not sure where this is coming from.

Day 15- Pediatrician called me Mom. I looked over my shoulder for the mom he was talking to. Guess it's going to take a while for this new title to sink in.

Day 16- Is spit up the new black? I'm beginning to think so as it's my main accessory with every outfit.

Day 17- Lying in a pillow covered in spit up. Too tired to care.

Day 18- Silently cried listening to the baby cry after I put her down for a nap. With tears streaming down my face, I sneaked into her room for the umpteenth time and peered into her crib without letting her see me. Feel like weird baby stalker.

Day 19- My poor mother is on the receiving end of a major sleep deprivation meltdown. After the hubs intervened and forced me to nap, I wake with no memory of the content of the meltdown. Scary.

Day 20- Liz arrives. She becomes my breastfeeding coach- determined to help me stock up on milk supply so I can sleep and someone else can feed the baby. Friendship taken to a whole new level when I attach pumps and pump with abandon right next to her on the living room sofa. Matters more to me to have milk for the hubs to feed baby than Liz seeing my areolas. But I do believe Liz was traumatized. Very traumatized.

Day 21- I was "that wife" today. Called the hubs at work to talk about poop. And formula. And nipples. Had to hang up mid-talk as I rose about my body and realized what I was doing.

Day 22- The baby smiled at me. I don't care what anyone says, she didn't smile because she had gas. She was really smiling!

Day 23- The baby burped a nice, deep, truck driver belch. Am more excited about this than when I was nominated for an Emmy.

Day 25- Baby asleep. Have the house to myself. Drinking coffee (shh...). Watching You're Cut Off marathon (another gift Liz gave me while here- turning me on to such a bad TV show). Feel like I've won the lottery.

Day 26- Another major accomplishment. Played Angry Birds- with my left hand- while feeding the baby!

Day 30- Baby had to get a shot. Decide that if I were to get shot with a double barrel shot gun in the face, it would hurt me less. Welcome to motherhood.

xoxo,

Lisa, a.k.a. "Mom"?!?!

BabyLover by Liz

Today's the day!  I'm jetting off to Chitown to meet Lisa's new bundle of joy.  It's been three long weeks since she arrived and I can't wait to see them both!  Lisa's excited for my arrival, but mostly because I promised to be her bitch for the next four days. Cooking?  I'm her Top Chef! Cleaning? I can do things with a mop you've never seen before! Poopy Diapers?  I handle that shit like no other!

But I have a small confession to make.

I'm not a baby person.

Before you get all Judgey Mcjudgerson on me, it's not that I don't like babies.  I just don't LOVE them the way many of my girlfriends do.  While y'all sit there goo-goo and ga-gaing over the blobs babies, I'm admiring them from a few feet away.  And while you might beg to babysit that screaming gurgling love bug, I'll be the one to help mom escape to have her first glass of wine in ten months. So you see, I'm not a baby hater, more like a baby liker.  That's okay, right?

And the funniest part?  Babies LOVE me.  It's like that whole wanting what you can't have thing starts at a very young age because I've got MAJUH game with the under one set.  They reach for me, fall asleep on me, and are generally really f*cking happy when I'm holding them.

I haven't broke the news to Lisa yet that I'm not going to goo-goo and ga-ga when I get there.  But I would think after 22 years of friendship that she knows I'm going to do my best Auntie work after age 2.  After all, she watched me muddle through the baby stages of both of my children-how can she NOT know?

But in honor of my visit, I thought I might try to become more baby-friendly.  So I've come up with a list of all the reasons why babies are the best.  *speaks into megaphone* Say it with me: BABIES ARE THE BEST! (Did that sound convincing?!!??)

WHY BABIES ARE THE BEST

1. A baby won't tell me my new haircut makes me look like Dora the Explorer.  Or yell at me when I'm a few minutes late picking them up.

2. Babies still get excited by and appreciate my boobs.  Even if they just view them as a food source.  Whatevs.  I'll take it.

3. Babies give me an excuse to nap during the day. (But do I still get to do that if it's not my baby?)

4. They can be a conversation starter at Starbucks. Because nothing says talk to me like a baby in a bugaboo.

5. They give me an excuse to carry an extra ten pounds and scare my pregnant friends with delivery room horror stories.  Ripped vaginas! Bad C-sections!  And my personal favorite?  Pooping on the delivery table!

See?  Babies are the BEST!!!

What do you think?  Leave a comment and you'll be entered to win one of TWO copies of The Inadequate Conception: From Barry White to Blastocytes: What your mom didn’t tell you about getting pregnant by Lori Green.  You can also check out her blog here.  I'll choose a winner on Sunday night after 6pm PST.

xo, Liz

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What's on Laurie Frankel's Bucket List?

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OMG- So many great books, so little time to read them!  We are LOVING what we've been reading lately, many from fabulous debut authors that we have a feeling will steal your heart with their fabulous novels. Today we have Laurie Frankel and her debut novel Atlas of Love. And even though she's totally wearing our Lit IT girl crown, she's sharing her bucket list with us today-we couldn't be happier about it! (And we hope she figures out that whole teleportation thing-that could come in handy!)

When Jill becomes both pregnant and single at the end of one spring semester, she and her two closest friends plunge into an experiment in tri-parenting, tri-schooling, and trihabitating as grad students in Seattle. Naturally, everything goes wrong, but in ways no one sees coming. Janey Duncan narrates the adventure of this modern family with hilarity and wisdom and shows how three lives are forever changed by (un)cooperative parenting, literature, and a tiny baby named Atlas who upends and uplifts their entire world. In this sparkling and wise debut novel, Frankel’s unforgettable heroines prove that home is simply where the love is.

We think that reading Atlas of Love would be a lovely way to spend your afternoon.  Log off Facebook and log into Frankel's sparkling debut!  And we have FIVE copies to give away!  Just leave a comment and we'll choose the winners on Friday night after 6pm PST.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: WHAT'S ON LAURIE FRANKEL'S BUCKET LIST?

This is the first “bucket list” I’ve ever made.  The term strikes me as a funny one -- I guess it’s about “kicking the bucket” (itself kind of a strange phrase) but it reminds me more of a hope chest, a repository for important things you want to carry, hold near, and maybe tote to the beach with you.  It’s also a funny thing for me to do right now.  In my 70s, I imagine the list will be wild adventures and final physical feats: skydiving or going walkabout or biking through France or something.  In contrast, I could go skydiving this weekend.  I mean I’d need to get babysitting.  But that’s really my only barrier.  That and I don’t really want to go skydiving.  I don’t especially like to fly.  It’d probably be really cold too.

My mid-30s bucket list then -- things I sincerely hope I’ll do soon enough, possibilities I want to keep with me and tote along to the beach -- isn’t especially glamorous.  It’s much more practical than all that.  I’ll still need babysitting though.

1. My first plan is to get really rich. Actually, I don’t need to be really rich.  Just a little rich.  Rich enough to quit my day job.  Not that I don’t like my day job.  I do.  I teach college, and I like it a lot.  But it’s interfering with all the other things I need to do.  I need to get rich enough for my husband to quit his day job too.  You can rearrange your life and make new priorities and plan and organize all you want, but you still need to sleep and shop for groceries and make dinner and walk the dog and pick up the 424 cars all over the living room rug every day, and your two-year-old isn’t going to entertain himself OR prevent his otherwise certain death from climbing up the bookshelves or over the back deck or under the lawnmower or on top of the stove.  Something has to go, and the day job seems like just the thing because what I really want to do is...

2. Write another novel. Hopefully several more novels.  And a play or two.  And see them all win awards and become bestsellers and receive lavish praise and brilliant stagings and get turned into gorgeous films so that I can go to the Oscars with my husband (must get babysitting) in one of those awesome dresses I always covet but never buy because where am I ever going to wear it?  It’s not like I live in Paris circa 1925 and might don something like that for a simple evening out.  Speaking of which, any minute now I’m going to...

3. Move abroad. I do love London.  You could talk me into almost anywhere though.  I hear wonderful things about the weather in South Africa, so maybe there.  Or Sydney or San Sebastian or somewhere Scandinavian or Costa Rican or Turkey or Malaysia.  I’m pretty flexible really.  Someplace warm and sunny would be nice.  And with a beach so I can bring my bucket.  Europe would be especially convenient because they have those super affordable airlines so you can go to Ibiza for the weekend.  I’d like to go to Ibiza for the weekend.  But I’m going to need some babysitting.  The best option for which is to...

4. Live nearer to more of the people I love. I live in Seattle, Washington.  My parents live in Columbia, Maryland.  My sister lives in Colorado.  My cousins live in California.  My best friend from high school lives in Virginia.  My best friend from grad school lives in South Carolina.  This sucks.  If everyone I loved lived in the same place, I’d move there.  But if I just picked one, I’d be missing only one fewer of those people than I am right now.  Plus my friends in Seattle.  Hopefully everyone will move abroad with me, but if not, I’d like someone to...

5. Figure out teleportation. What is the holdup on that anyway?  Physicists are supercolliding atoms under France and recreating the birth of the universe and developing really strong nanotubes of carbon, and NONE of that is doing me any good at all.  Teleportation, on the other hand, would be really useful.  That way I could spend the day on the beach in Kauai, have dinner at that great pizza place in Trastavere, and then go see a play afterwards at the Donmar Warehouse in London.  And the best part is...free, high-quality babysitting -- plus my mother’s french toast in the morning -- in Columbia, Maryland.

To read more about Laurie, check out her website or head on over to  her Facebook page.

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What's on Cathie Beck's Bucket List?

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There are few things that we love more than a good book.  But a glass of wine is right up there.  Which is why when we saw the memoir, Cheap Cabernet: A Friendship by Cathie Beck, we knew we had to take a closer look.  Because we figured anything about friends and wine just had to be fabulous! Originally self-published, Cheap Cabernet received with so much praise that it was picked up a major publisher. (You go, Girl!)

Cathie Beck was in her late thirties and finally able to exhale after a lifetime of just trying to get by. A teenage mother harboring vivid memories of her own hardscrabble childhood, Cathie had spent years doing whatever it took to give her children the stability— or at least the illusion of it— that she’ d never had. More than that, through sheer will and determination, she had educated them and herself too. With her kids in college, Cathie was at last ready to have some fun. The only problem was that she had no idea how to do it and no friends to do it with. So she put an ad in the paper for a made-up women's group: WOW . . . Women on the Way. Eight women showed up that first night, and out of that group a friendship formed, one of those meteoric, passionate, stand-by-you friendships that come around once in a lifetime and change you forever . . . if you’ re lucky.

We think you'll love this honest and hilarious memoir.  And guess what?  We have TWO copies to giveaway!  Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: WHAT'S ON CATHIE BECK'S BUCKET LIST?

Ah yes … bucket lists – where we get to literally throw caution and inhibition to wind and declare that which will make our lives complete, should we get the chance to attain them before our last breaths.

One item on my “for real” bucket list was to publish a book. It took ten years and ten more years off my life (read the Poets & Writers story at www.cathiebeck.com/press). But on July 20, 2010, Hyperion Books published “Cheap Cabernet: A Friendship” – a wild ride of two women in the 40s who drink lots of wine and get into some trouble. But they’ve got good hearts and the friendship rocked both our worlds – changing our lives in ways we never saw coming. Bet you know a friend or two like that.

In the meantime, here are a few things that are “must-dos” on my bucket list. In no particular order:

1.  Date Alec Baldwin.  I don’t mean just go on one of those sad, Oprah-episode, “you get to LUNCH WITH ALEC BALDWIN!” dates – I mean I’d really like to hang out with him and date him. Like where we watched movies (imagine!) and he took me to good restaurants and when he had a Hollywood function to attend, I’d be “His Girl.” I know he’s a cad and I’m not talking about marrying him, but I’d love to go meet his parents and his brothers and then I’d love him to fall madly, deeply in love with me. Oh please. Why not?

2. Jeff Bridges. See “Date Alec Baldwin.”  Since Jeff is married and devoted to his 30+-year-long marriage/wife and since it is then completely unrealistic that we’d ever date, you should know that I’d throw Baldwin backward in a heartbeat for a Bridges opp. Jeff, are you reading this?

3. Lunch with Bill Clinton. Yes there’s a tiresome and obvious theme playing out here, but at least it’s a brainy, interesting theme. The lunch I’d have with Bill Clinton would be one of those loooonnng lunches, where he  go off the wagon and have one too many “Jim Beams & 7s” and he’d start telling risqué jokes and maybe even slightly flirting, though that’s not what I’m after. What I’m after is a loose-lipped Clinton all full of himself (and of Jim Beam) and willing to divulge tidbits that never hit the headlines. Just for the fun of it.

4. Win the Nobel Prize in Literature.  There, I said it. I know full well how ridiculous and egotistical that sounds. I cannot help it. Did you SEE the great gown and the pomp and circumstance when Tony Morrison went to England to accept the Nobel? I just want to wear the cool gown and eat with British Royalty and courtesy. Whatever it is I have to win to do that.

5.  Sing a song, live, with Al Green or Bette Midler. This one’s creepy and I hope that Rev. Green and The Divine Miss M don’t seek court protection after this runs -- but the truth is that I melt whenever I see either of them live (now, probably 6 times each). If they are unavailable and/or freaked out about this the very thought of this, Jamie Foxx would work too.

Thanks Cathie! xo, L&L

To read more about Cathie, head on over to her website or find her on Facebook and Twitter .  You can also email her at Cathie@cathiebeck.com.

Cash & Carry by Liz

So I think I've mentioned or maybe you've just noticed that I can be a bit of a control freak sometimes. But there's always been one aspect of my life that I've had no control of... My spending habits.

Yes, I can calculate the calories in those chips and guacamole in an instant but am unable to balance my checkbook properly.  I have the willpower to completely cut out food groups(cheese? Who needs it?) but cannot resist the Nordstrom half-yearly sale.  Or that adorable Calvin Klein dress.  Or ANYTHING at The Container Store. (Damn that place! Who really needs a onion saver??!!!?)

And I don't need to pay a therapist $300/hour to tell me that I buy things to make myself feel better.  Having a bad week? Shaking my ass in that new little black dress will make the world feel right again. Feeling fat? Buying all those pink acrylic glasses at Target made me feel light and dainty. Bored? Nothing like online shopping to fill the hours.  For me, there was no better high than a shopping one.

Until that damn American Express bill showed up.  Was I actually supposed to pay that freakin' thing off each month?  Oops.

But that ginormous monthly statement never seemed to stop my love affair with my gold card.  No matter how much we made, we would somehow manage to outspend it by ALOT.  And all along I told myself that it would be IMPOSSIBLE to cut one thing out of our budget. That there's no way I could live without sushi, Starbucks or a Brazillian Blowout.

I was wrong.

I don't remember exactly when it hit me.  Maybe it was what seemed the millionth time the hubs and I were having the same conversation about money.  We always look and each other and stupidly ask Where does it all go? without ever having the balls to actually look and SEE WHERE THE MONEY ACTUALLY GOES. Because it's much easier just to buy what you want and pretend that living within your means is just impossible than to try to cut back.  And we had so many things to blame!

The cost of living is so high in Southern California!

I could buy a BMW for what we pay for daycare each year!

I have to get my hair done every month-I'm going gray! (Sad to say this one actually very true...)

But most of it was bullshit.  Yes, it is ridiculously expensive to live here and I dream for the day we don't have to pay for daycare anymore.  But the real problem was not with those things.  It was with us.

My issue was living like I was a millionaire.  And my hubs?  His problem was saying NO to my spending.  He had been my YES man for a long time.  And as much as I loved him for always telling me I deserved that new pair of shoes, I finally had to admit that he was just enabling a terrible habit. But was was the solution?

Cash  & Carry, yo.

I had always been a cashless wonder.  I was the girl who always took your cash for the meal and paid with my credit card.  Parked in a parking structure?  I'm the one begging for five bucks so I can get out.  And I'd always have to avoid eye contact with the homeless people holding signs by the freeway.

Now I would be given a cash allotment each week.  And and I had to learn to *gasp* THINK about what I was spending.  Groceries, Starbucks, happy hour.  It all had to come out of my piggy bank.  But if I was able to hold my shit together and not overspend, we would only spend what we made. (Novel concept, right?)  And then, if we could do that for awhile, then we could do this other thing we never do.  Save money.

It was tough at first.  My Starbucks baristas just couldn't get over the fact that I was paying them in cash and I had to save for three weeks before I could get a mani-pedi.(And forget about any extra massage!)  But as sad as I was not to buy that adorable dress at Loehmann's, the feeling of gaining control over my finances was exhilarating.  Spending was one area of my life that always felt out-of-control-like a addiction I couldn't shake.  And each week that I was able to stay in my new budget felt like a small victory.  I finally came to realize that the world was not going to END if I didn't buy Hanky Pankys in every color.  (Although having them in every color would be really awesome.)

And even though we got a bit off track with the holidays(The Coach boots were on sale, I SWEAR!), I'm actually looking forward to getting back to our cash & carry routine.  Because when you don't buy every damn thing that you want, it makes the things you do buy seem that much sweeter.

How about you?  How do you save money?

xo, Liz

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What's on Susan Elizabeth Phillips' Bucket List?

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We're so excited for all the fantastic books coming out in 2011.  And you know you can count on us to have all your fave authors and books here! First up?  New York Times bestselling author Susan Elizabeth Phillips.  Susan soared onto the NYT bestseller list with Dream a Little Dream.  Now comes Call Me Irresistible-out January 18th, which intersects characters featured in in three of her most beloved novels. Lucy Jorik is the daughter of a former president of the United States.  Meg Koranda is the offspring of legends.  One of them is about to marry Mr. Irresistible—Ted Beaudine—the favorite son of Wynette, Texas. The other is not happy about it and is determined to save her friend from a mess of heartache.

But even though Meg knows that breaking up her best friend's wedding is the right thing to do, no one else seems to agree. Faster than Lucy can say "I don't," Meg becomes the most hated woman in town—a town she's stuck in with a dead car, an empty wallet, and a very angry bridegroom. Broke, stranded, and without her famous parents at her back, Meg is sure she can survive on her own wits. What's the worst that can happen? Lose her heart to the one and only Mr. Irresistible? Not likely. Not likely at all.

Sound good?  Click here to pre-order it!

Fun and sassy, we think that Call me Irresistible is the perfect way to start off the new year!  And we have FIVE copies to give away. Just leave a comment and you'll be entered to win!  We'll pick the winners on Friday night after 6pm PST.

CHICK LIT IS NOT DEAD PRESENTS: WHAT'S ON SUSAN ELIZABETH PHILLIP'S BUCKET LIST?

1. I’ve been working on my bucket list for the past few years, starting with some amazing walking and hiking trips in Europe, Central America, Canada, and Alaska. Still on the agenda: ¾Morocco, Greece, and more of the British Isles.

2. Master a big girl camera as opposed to my trusty point and shoot.

3. Learn how to bake a great pie.

4. Learn how to eat a small portion of great pie instead of , say, half the sucker in one sitting.

5. Satisfy my unhealthy fascination with Oprah by becoming her second best friend, after Gayle. Do you think I need a shrink?

Thanks Susan! xo, L&L

To read more about Susan, check out her website or find her on Facebook.

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