Not That

Watch This, Not That: Pregnancy Edition By Lisa

Since becoming pregnant (I'm 20 weeks!), some of my television watching choices have been more than slightly affected. Let's just say there's certain television programming that I cannot watch and have to stay very far away from. (I'll spare you the details!) Instead, I'd rather focus on the shows my big belly self wants to lounge on the couch and watch.  Basically anything prego, hot man or DIY related!

1. Bethenny Getting Married? Confession: When Bethenney was on The Real Houswives of New York City, she kind of bugged me. I have no idea why, with all the drama queens on that show, she stood out. But then something happened. She got her own show and I immediately saw her in a different light. She got pregnant right around the time I found out I was pregnant. And I felt strangely bonded to her. I'm "older", she's "older". I got married later, she got married later. In fact, we both had whirlwind years- marrying and and getting pregnant within months. I think she's one of those people you either love or hate- but I absolutely love her. I love her zingy one liners and direct approach with people like her lovable, albeit often clueless intern. And I'll admit that maybe I've become a little obsessed- searching for an hour the other day to find the exact stroller she had on the show!

2.Mad Men Since entering my second trimester, I've dreamed about Don Draper (John Hamm), um, more times than I'd like to admit (it's almost embarrassing- almost!). They said "certain hormones" would finally kick in and boy, have they evuh! In the form of having the major hots for one dark and sexy leading man on one of my all-time favorite shows. Now ladies, if you haven't tuned into Mad Men- if for no other reason than to scope out Mr. Draper, you're seriously missing out! But even beyond this sexy drink of water (okay, I need to stop!) the show is fabulous! It's some of the most brilliant writing on television. Not to mention the mean girl crush I have on another series regular, Joan Harris, (Christina Hendricks) because, well, she just has curves in all the right places! I actually didn't discover this show until last year and was immediately hooked. I quickly rented all the seasons until I caught up. And I recommend you do too! But beware, between all the drinking (on the job!) and sexing (with everyone and anyone) the show makes you want to be naughty! (Or maybe it's just me- the drink deprived, hormone surging prego?)

3. DIY Network There's Garage Mahal, Kitchen Impossible and Bathtastic to name just a few. I'm such a die-hard fan that I even watch Man Caves. There's something about the idea that I can lay my own tile that gets my juices flowing.  I blame my obsession with DIY on my pregnancy. I'm nesting, right? Isn't that what pregos do? I feel so empowered by being able to "do it myself" that I'm planning to paint the nursery, install a closet organizer and put together the crib by. my. self. Because if the dude from Turf Wars says I can, then I can.  Right?

xoxo, Lisa

Watch This, Not That: Summer Edition by Liz

Summer's finally here and I'm looking forward to all the things that come along with it. Like beach bonfires, BBQs and...all kinds of TV shows that weren't good enough for the regular season! Remember back in the day when the only thing on in the summer were reruns of all your favorite shows?  But then the powers that be realized that viewers were so desperate for fresh programming in July that they'd watch just about anything!  And so the summer season was born...

I'll admit that I've grown rather fond of many summer substandard shows. (Um, is this where I admit that I'm a closet Big Brother fan?)  And I always cheer just a little bit when one of my summer crushes graduates to the bigtime, aka the fall season schedule. (Bravo SYTYCD and Dancing with the Stars!)

And this summer is no exception with it's choices of gluttonous reality TV.  And lucky for you, I'm here to navigate y'all through what's trashy in a good way to what's just trash.


Losing it with Jillian I ran into this show by accident last week and thought I couldn't stand the thought of one more minute of Jillian's workouts, which usually consist of screaming and dramatic speeches about people healing from the inside.  But I was soon mesmerized by her heartfelt attempt to help an obese mom and dad lose weight in time for their daughter's wedding.  And I cried like a baby when Jillian gave her lameass, overly dramatic, camera too close to her face speech.  Against my better judgment, I'm season passing this one.

Wipeout What does it say about me that I LOVE LOVE LOVE to watch people eat sh*t on the big red balls?  I tried to tell myself that it was my crush on John Henson(dating all the way back to his days on Talk Soup) that kept me coming back for more.  But then I finally came to the realization that watching these people make asses out of themselves just makes me happy after a long day.  Don't judge.


The Bachelorette I've got to throw out the disclaimer that I actually watch this show religiously every week(so many facebook status opportunities! I can't control myself!) and have been a huge fan since the day Trista gave out her first rose. But this season can be, um, well, SLIGHTLY UNWATCHABLE at times. Between the wrestler, the James Spader wannabe and the questionable sexual orientation of the weatherman, I find myself rolling my eyes much more than usual. (And that's saying a lot people!)  And please someone tell me why we can't get through an episode without one of these guys crying a river.  It's making me want to take a torch and burn the rest of Ali's roses. (Or her hair extensions-WTF with those?)

True Beauty Another show that I'm beginning to have a love/hate relationship with.  Something about the horribly obnoxious and shallow contestants (who think their competing to be the "face of Las Vegas" but are really being judged on their inner beauty) is both repulsive and addicting at the same time.  But either way, I'm always wondering the same thing: Where the hell do they find these people? And I can never tell if it's my desperation to watch something new or actual humor that makes host Carson Kressly's quips funny.  Either way, I have a feeling that True Beauty will be gathering dust in my Tivo this summer.

Honorable NOT THAT mention: Minute to Win it is so incredibly lame that I refuse to write more than one sentence about it-you'll just have to trust me on this one.

What are YOU watching this summer?

xoxo, Liz

Match me if you Can by Liz

I've always fancied myself a matchmaker. Which is probably why I declared my love for The Millionaire Matchmaker in last week's Watch this, not That and why I am loving Marla Martenson's new memoir DIARY OF A BEVERLY HILLS MATCHMAKER, a hilarious look at her days as a real-life L.A. matchmaker. Want a chance to win your own copy?  Just leave a comment about your own dating experiences and you'll be entered to win! Back in the day,  I'd set singles up with abandon.  In fact, I think I set up one of my guy friends so much that he ended up dating just about every single girl I knew with in a thirty-mile radius. Good for him, bad for my parties. *cue awkward situation*

Truth be told, not one of my matches ever worked out.  My superior sales skills would bring them each to the table, (She's so smart!  He loves his mother!) but it never quite clicked.  Most crashed and burned pretty quickly, with me standing in the middle. And that's the thing- a true matchmaker probably holds the secret how to put two people you care about together without getting involved with the fallout when it fails. Because, let's admit it, most of them do. But when it works out, you get all the glory...

Did I mention that Lisa and her hubby were setup?  They were so happy about it that they even made a special toast to the couple who brought them together at the rehearsal dinner!  And yes, I was secretly jealous.  Because I had also tried my hand at setting her up over the years unsuccessfully.  But considering her matchmaker has at least five marriages under her setup belt, there was no way I could compete.  This woman has a gift. And after fifteen years of trying, I'm willing to publicly admit that I was a sucky setter-upper.

But good or bad, it's always a good story-here are some of my personal faves:

1. Slammed into the back of a hottie driving a BMW on the 405 freeway. (sorry about the bumper!)  Too cute to let him get away but already married, boldly asked him if he was single and gave him Lisa's email address.  Yep, right there on the side of the road. He turned out to be a total douche bag. But still, I think I deserve an A for effort. Right, Lisa?

2. During an impromptu post break-up trip to Las Vegas, pushed Lisa off on a Teva-with-socks wearing Midwesterner at Coyote Ugly in an attempt to make her feel better. Should I even mention the irony when we discovered later that his last name was ROTTEN? Widely considered my rock bottom as matchmaker. Lesson learned: Don't EVUH set someone up while in Vegas. There's a reason what happens in Vegas stays there.

3.One of my BFs said she had a mailman that I just had to meet. I was skeptical but curious.(I had never gone government before!)  But when we accidentally bumped into his hot swing dance partner on our first date, I knew it wasn't a love connection. Let's just say I wish my friend had led with "swing-dancing mailman". It would have saved us all a lot of time.

4. Things were going well with the hot district attorney that my roommate set me up with. Until I made a drunken argument for why, as children, we were allowed to skip but not run on the playground. Because, really, wasn't skipping faster? In my defense, I was one fast-ass skipper in my time.  After that, our case was dismissed.

Tell us your blind date and/or matchmaking story and be entered to win DIARY OF A BEVERLY HILLS MATCHMAKER!

xo, Liz

Watch this, not that by Liz

As much as I love my children, I must admit there's one aspect of my pre-mommy life that I miss so much it hurts sometimes...

Sitting on the couch for hours watching bad TV.

These days I'm lucky if I can keep up with Project Runway (forget about that Models of the Runway show) and usually just have the hubs give me his dramatic reenactment of that week's Amazing Race. (Which, btw, he never quite seems to do it justice...)  My Tivo is constantly erasing my fave shows in favor of Hot Wheels, Battle Force 5 and I've had to re-prioritize my priority manager more times than I care to mention.

So, I had to learn the hard way how to become a more discerning TV watcher. And because I know many of us have the same problem, I'm happy to help ya out a bit by cutting through all the bullshit and letting you know to Watch this, not that!

Watch The Good Wife

There's a reason that EW chose The Good Wife as one of the ten best TV shows on right now. I was originally drawn to this show hoping to get my *Mr. Big* fix but ending up staying because of Julianna Marguiles. It's a story about a woman who stands by her man through a political scandal and finds herself entering the work force after staying home for fifteen years raising her two children.  The storyline is so layered, so well acted, that my stomach does a little flip each week when I see that Tivo has recorded it.  And the best part?  It's got enough criminal procedural stuff going on that your hubby won't feel like he's emasculating himself by watching it with you each week!

Watch The Millionaire Matchmaker

With less time to watch TV these days, I think this is the kind of show I miss most.  The Millionaire Matchmaker kindly runs marathons constantly, just begging you to sit your lazy ass on the couch and watch as Matchmaker Patti cuts through any and all BS. She. Is. Genius. From the way she handles the enormous millionaires' egos or catfights with a drag queen, she is fantastic.  Whether she's telling the real estate developer that cuff links are so 1987 and that his haircut channels that guy from Greatest American Hero or she's telling off an NBA player for mistreating one of her girls, she has the balls to say exactly what we're all thinking.  If you only have time for one guilty pleasure on your Tivo, I highly recommend this!

Not Cougar Town

I really wanted to like Cougar Town.  It sounded right up my alley-alums from Scrubs, Friends and Dawson's Creek (don't judge!) and also featuring the ridiculously hot Josh Hopkins.  Not to mention the fact that, at age thirty-six, I'm *gulp* entering cougar territory myself and was hoping to relate to some of Courtney Cox's antics.  While watching the pilot, I told myself that it was just a fluke that it seemed, um, awkward and forced.  But since I was determined to become a Cougar Town fan, I gave it a few weeks to get it together.  But I then returned to discover that they were STILL trying too hard.  And while it may still have a place in my Tivo, (right next to the twelve episodes of Desperate Housewives I can't bring myself to watch) Cougar Town lost it's place in my heart.

Not Tool Academy

Wanna feel better about your own relationship?  Then Tool Academy may be right up your alley.  It's about women(and a few good men) who, in a last ditch effort to save their relationship, bring their bandana-wearing, fake tanning, cheating significant others to the Tool Academy. After spending thirty minutes with Neander-Tool, Looney-Tool and DoubleTalking-Tool, I didn't blame that girlfriend one bit for screaming I'll cut your ass! at the therapy session.  I felt like screaming too.

For those of us who loved bad boys back in the day, this show will make you squirm, remembering what it was like to date a complete DOUCHE BAG and rejoice in the fact that you pulled your head out of your ass before it was too late.  New favorite quote: You can't turn a ho into a housewife~Daniel a.k.a. Glow Stick Tool

What are YOU watching this week?

xoxo, Liz

Extreme Makeover: Chick Lit Is Not Dead Edition

We are SO excited to be celebrating our ONE YEAR anniversary here at Chick Lit is not Dead.

*clinks champagne glasses together*

It seems like just yesterday that Liz was writing about the State Of The Union and Lisa was proclaiming her Facebook Whoreness to the world. From Xoxo to Potty Peril to Should You Friend Your Ex on Facebook?, we're so thankful that you've been with us for every blog post along the way. THANK YOU!

And what better way to celebrate than to give ourselves a complete MAKEOVER?  A little nip here, a tuck there and CLIND feels like a whole new site!

Huge props to the very talented Betsy Cohen at Positive Element and Debbie Friedrich at Debbie Friedrich Photography for helping us get ready for our close-up. (Be sure to click through all our pages to see her beautiful photos!) And, as always, we are indebted to the fabulous and talented Crystal Patriarche at BookSparksPR, the best publicist we could ever ask for!

And it's not just our look that's changed.  This year, we'll be stepping up our game, not only by bringing you more interviews with Bestselling Authors, but we also hope to keep you laughing with new features. Like...

Mommy Mondays Writing about the trials and tribulations of parenting, Liz will do her best impersonation of a Mommy blogger. (Don't worry, she'll do her best to avoid any and all "poopy" references.)

Writing Wednesdays Come with us on our journey to finding an agent and publisher for our second novel. We'll simultaneously overload you with our borderline obsession with affirmations and the power of positive thinking (It. Will. Happen. It. Will. Happen. It. Will. Happen.)

Watch this, not that We'll be sure to let you know what's worth Tivoing that week. (For example: we'll watch 650 pound Virgin so you don't have to!)

But don't worry, we'll still have plenty of time to do what we do best-make lists about ANYTHING and EVERYTHING.

And to celebrate, we're giving away a BLACKBERRY PEARL flip phone.  All you have to do is leave a comment letting us know what you think of our new look and you could be a winner. No pressure, but you better LOVE. IT! And if you want to post a link to let your Facebook friends or tweeps know about our new look, we'd be eternally grateful! =)

Thank you again for all of your love and support this past year.  We're having a blast and we hope you are too!


Liz & Lisa